Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
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He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
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