don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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