i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
