How'd it feel making her break her religion?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
How do u even exfoliate your vagina