I think i peed on brittanys purse
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse