I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Randomize
