Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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