I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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