CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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