just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
