You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
These 17 People Made Horrible Decisions That Ruined Their Lives
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...