Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
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