Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
