wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Randomize
