i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
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