Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
