there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize