i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
