I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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