another moral hangover. fuck.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize