i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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