We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Randomize
