its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
