I think I won the penis lottery.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
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