Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I just want nice things and good sex
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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