I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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