So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
