He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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