First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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