Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
that may or may not have been my penis.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
