I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
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