That's intense
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
