I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
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I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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