She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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