Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
