he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
he was CRYING into my vagina
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize