He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
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Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
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Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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