Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
