Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
