they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
