even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
