guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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