Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
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