i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
