So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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