Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
