i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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