let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
