Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
