If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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