Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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